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Allow me to share this precious gem that I've learned after repeating the same mistake again, and again and again throughout my early 20s: If my partner isn't stimulating me sexually, my partner doesn't stand a chance at stimulating me .

By then they could be too involved to turn their back, or have even begun to get addicted to the drama.

A person who only cares about pleasing his or herself during sex isn't going to care at ALL about pleasing me in a long-term, committed relationship. He or she will make a big show of dutifully trying to fool us at first, but trust me, girls: It's only a matter of time before we realize all of whom are selfish in the bedroom are selfish in LIFE…The reason it's so important to take into account how a person behaves in the bedroom is because it's only during the act of sex that we're able to get a glimpse into the raw, animalistic version of who a person .

You can't hide your true nature when you're having sex.

It is one of my deepest wishes for no girl to ever have to experience sex with a selfish lover. Most importantly, it's as much for our own pleasure as it is for our partner's. Someone we're actually teeming with excitement and longing for.

It's f*cking laborious (and often traumatic), and far too many of us have suffered through it. Contrary to how society might attempt to make us girls feel — SEX is a two-way street. And we're considering crossing into the exclusive “relationship zone” with this gorgeous, cunning new specimen.




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A sex contract is also not likely to absolve you of your legal and financial obligations in the event of a pregnancy. A carefully considered contract will make sure you and your partner have a mutual understanding of what is about to happen, any sexual health issues you may have, and what sort of birth control is in place.


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